allthatjazzley.

how important swimming is to me nowadays.

oh mother nature, thank you so much. not really. i need to swim.

it wakes me up in the mornings, and feels so great when i’m sore. it refreshes me and it’s fun. contrary to what i thought in the beginning, it’s not much of a hassle. you just do it. it’s not too bad either, with 0 period p.e. the weight room gives me a chance to stretch and warm up a little bit.

i miss swimming.

at least it’s a short week.

but then, idk what i’m gonna do over break. we’ll see.

i listen to music constantly, to hear someone else’s thoughts or feelings, instead of mine.

“time is of the essense.”

a quite well known quote.

we often find ourselves either with too much, or not enough time on our hands. it i  rare that someone has mapped out their time, and follows it precisely.

just a comforting thought.

i have been such good friends with this girl. i just caught up with her on the phone, about 5 mintues ago.

i realized that we’ve always been good friends-it’s been about 4/5 years. why and how? we both have some key similar characteristics:

-we give, or try to give, people the benefit of the doubt. we’re both aware that as humans, we tend to automatically judge people. but we try not to, giving them the benefit of the doubt. why? because, we both just don’t know, and rather not make such assumptions without to.

-we both have a genuine love of knowledge. even if our reasons for this passion may be different, we still come to the conclusion in appreciation to knowledge. i may be more dependent upon it, but we both hold a curiosity.

those are only two characteristics, but hold strong. lhana and i just understand each other. we are both constantly thinking. we think along the same lines, but our intentions are often very different. which makes us different.

-we both have a mutual understanding of each other, that we are both different individuals. we see and recognize our contrasting points. we respect each other a great deal and support each other.

the fact that i’m writing this though, proves that i think about things alot. i’m overthinking our relationship, but it’s no harm. this girl is truly a great friend.

<3

i’m not going to class today. this first week of school has felt too long. finally some time for me rest for myself.

i haven’t had a free saturday like this in about 2 years. how nice.

it’s quite relaxing.

whoooo.

it’s only been a week of school-5 days, and it feels like 4 months. it’s insane. it was all too easy to slide back into the motion of school days.

i’m just so exhausted.

i took a trial of jazzIV today. i made it. usually, i’d be really excited, and happy. but tonight, no. i didn’t give it my best. i tried hard to keep my energy up, but i was so physically drained. at least i’ve left room for improvement. i caught the choreo and speed quickly, it surprised me. but as i left the room, i knew i expected myself to make it. 

i’ve been doing school work between all my breaks. pointeII almost had no teacher. it was hard and pushed myself. i’ve been up since 5. had swim. swim was surprisngly refreshing and acutally woke me up. it was nice. i was able to get through the whole day.   

i was supposed to have a couple more hours of dance, but i called it quits for tonight. too tired. and now just finish homework, then goodnight.

i’ve realized how weak i am.

time to change.

 jun and zahaan’s mom give up too…………………………………

we give up aswell… life is just tooooo… FUN!

so this is what it’s like to spend an afternoon with guys. it consists of four main things:

1-video games/t.v.

2-food: soda, pizza, hotwings, chips, and since it’s spencer-some sort of pastry

3-computer: fuels music and youtube videos

4-cards

it’s pretty funny being an observer and witnessing this. it’s pretty fun, and they’re hysterical. 

there is also:

-yelling, screaming, usually at some sort of computer screen

-sexual joking and references

-random singing, drumbeats and running around

and yeah, that’s pretty much it. better then being home. i’m actually enjoying myself. ahaa.

ohmygosh.

i cannot put in words how happy i am after taking jen’s class.

i actually showed up late, because my parents were taking their time, and we had never gone to the studio before. but once i passed the window, i saw jen automatically smile.

i came in, put my stuff on the side and was about to go to the back of the room to my spot when she said, “come over here and give me a hug!” i missed her so much, it was soooo great to see her! i hugged a couple other girls i hadn’t seen in a while, and went to my spot.

it was so great to do her warm up and exercises again. my mind and body were both screaming “YES!” inside. we did some new turns combos and leaps. leaps! ah, it was so good to do leaps with her again. i don’t want to go to my leaps class tomorrow anymore now. but i will, because i have to. and it’s about the dance.

but it was so nice being in a structured dance class. a professional teacher who ran her class, and actually taught. and it was a blast. ahhh. it feels so good.

she said she’ll have her own studio soon. maybe by october? let’s hope! i can’t wait. it’s exciting. i’ve definitely been in need of good news and hope lately. i’m just. i’m so happy.

whoooo[:

good dance night.

my calves are burning, my ankles are sore and my arches are tingly. my core feels good and my shoulders/back feel toned. whooo. it’s physical times like this when you know that dance will kick your butt.

classes were fun with alli today; but she was injured, so it was a little more difficult. when i assisted ballet3, i could tell she was having a hard time; trying not to move, but feeling the need to in order to teach.

i got contacts today. yay. finally. it’s so much easier to dance and spot, etc. it’s nice.

i think of him less by each passing day. but yet i still have that piece of hope that still leaves me hurting. ohwell. sigh.

gwen taught last night again.

she did a really pretty combo to ‘like a star.’ her barre had good flow and quality of movement as well.

i was so exhausted from pointe and ballet, i didn’t write last night.

only 4 girls showed up to pointe today. 3 out of 4 girls had new shoes, and i was the only one without. i wouldn’t say it was mean, but gwen was yelling. i took it as strict and trying to help us, but it was brutal. she’s giving us a lot of material, that, we’re not ready or strong enough for. plus, the girls had new shoes, and emily and i hadn’t danced in a week. things seemed to be fine, until ally burst into tears after barre. it was just sad. there was nothing we could do.

the studio was soo empty. there were 3 girls in my class, and 3 people in the studio next door. probably under 10 people in the whole studio. it was almost scary. but i like small classes, they’re more fun. it was just sad to know that in the jazz class before ballet there were at least 15 girls there, some of which are enrolled in my ballet class. but they all left after jazz, to go to jen’s class. i’m not say it’s a bad thing, because i understand why they’re going, it’s just sad.

 i got home, quite tired. i could have easily been aggravated, but i didn’t let it it keep me down. i made a new friend, who wasn’t too new. i’ve actually known him for 10 years. fun night.

jazz.

oh, it’s a part of me.

i took class with brandi again. and quite frankly, i surprised myself.

at the start of class i wasn’t very sore, just my gluts and inner thighs were a little strained. warm ups were simple and easy, and the ab workout felt really good after. i was also oddly still flexible, despite my week of not dancing. across the floor was when i really shocked myself.

we did a fast paced combo with ale secondes, three of them, and then pulling into at least a double to finish the eight count. my ale seconds were quite clean, and i ended up pulling into at least 3 turns, and a slow fourth, to get back into the chaines to restart the combo. i’m still wondering how i did that.

we did a similar combo with fouettes, which was also successful. then we did leaps, and a tricky combo that i had just learned went smoothly as well. i really surprised myself. then we learned a combo, with funky counts of steps into a turning tilted fan, which was interesting. that, i also mastered quickly. i’m really surprising myself.

aha. all in all, great class. i’m just wondering if i’ll be sore tomorrow morning. i hope so! it’s so good to dance again.

it started out with a study session at northridge mall. i met moises at borders a little after 10.30. we couldn’t find anywhere to sit there, so we walked and talked until we settled on a booth in the foodcourt. then lhana arrived soon after, and we started studying.

after about an hour of working, we walked around and ran some errands. we sat and talked for a while, catching up and enjoying each others company. after a while, lhana and i said goodbye to moises, and we set off to the beach.

lhana and i went to my house, where we had a good time looking at harrypotter related things. we laughed, then ate. there was a car drive to the beach, and it was amazing.

it was so good to be near the sea again. we set off, splashing and jumping around in the water, making marks in the sand. then there was a quiet, short lunch. the breeze was delightful and the landscape was beautiful. after lunch, we built sandcastles, digging moats around them. at first, we had the hardest time making the castles. i don’t remember making sand castles to be so difficult. after several tires, we built 3 successful sand structures. the rest of the time was spent building symmetrical moats around the castles. we almost lost a kite as well, and were lucky that it was caught on some sea grass. the day was simple, carefree, and fun. we soon cleaned things up, and took some last pictures.

the car ride home was generally quiet, for we were tired. we dropped lhana home and, here i am. showered, and resting, i am quite satisfied.